tonight

Tonight after coming home from work I sat on the couch and watched Ryan put together some pictures at the kitchen table. We chatted about the day.

Something about this night was good. There was a good feeling in the air.

I felt complete peace and joy. I smiled and told Ryan I loved him. He responded with the same.

I told him how much I love our little family. I know he felt the same.

Although the day was tiring. It was great coming home to such peace and sincere joy.

I love my Ryan. More than words can express.

5k

I did one today. Check out my thoughts about it here at my "Journey to Healthy Living" blog. :)

catching up

This past month with not eating sugar, and all things "white", and soda, has been really good. I'm way over the cravings of any of that junk.

It's funny but the one thing I really crave is meat. Red meat. A nice juicy steak. I've never been a red meat eater; always stuck to chicken or turkey. But man, I can't get enough of steak. I don't eat it everyday or anything like that...maybe once a week...but man when I crave it I CRAVE it! Ryan and I have gone to Rodizio a few times this month just to curb my meat cravings. You'd think I was pregnant or something, but I'm not. I guess my body just needs red meat.

Water is my best friend and I drink a lot of it each day. Overall from my highest weight I'm down 26 lbs. not too shabby.

I have a lot more to go but progress is being made and I'm crossing my fingers that when I go back to my Dr. in a month he'll tell me I don't need to be on insulin.

I like trying on pants that used to not fit very well and having them almost fall off of me. It's a good feeling.

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Last week my brother Quinn called me to say he had a late b-day present for me. He said he had tickets to Josh Groban for me that night. Woot Woot! I've always like Josh Groban. But I'll be honest. It was a Saturday and I was tired from just finishing up shooting a wedding with my friend. The last thing I wanted to do was go to a concert, but I did and I'm glad I did. He was good! The best part is that I was on the floor and 6 rows from the front. It was awesome! That guy is really funny and really cool. He's a great entertainer, and of course a great singer, musician. I went with Darlene, and my sister Megan. So fun!




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I wanted to document a dream I had the other night because I don't want to forget it.
I had a dream that I was pregnant, and ready to give birth. It was my due date and Ryan was anxious for me to get to the hospital, saying we needed to get going and we needed to get going now. I kept telling him that I wasn't even in labor yet. He said it didn't matter but that he wanted us to go so they could check. I thought he was being so silly, but then saw that he was just being cautious and was so concerned that everything would go well. It was cute. I just kept thinking..."but I'm not in labor, I have no pains".

It was a good dream. One that I hoped was real. I think Ryan and I are both feeling that we are closer to having kids - whether by giving birth to them or adopting. It's a good feeling. We'll see what happens. :)

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Oh! I have changed positions at work, and I couldn't be happier. I've been XANGO's call center Manager or 6 years now. As much as I enjoyed working with the agents and working so closely with our Distributors I'm grateful to not be a manager any more. I'm now an Administrative Assistant to my boss. It's a good move and the timing was perfect. I was burned out big time.

Ok, I think that's about it! Hope you all are having a great week. :)

Where to go? What to do?

If I haven't mentioned already (and I totally have) I work for a great company. After you've worked there for 7 years XANGO lets you take a 6 week, PAID, sabbatical. Seriously so awesome!

Guess what my friends...next July will be 7 years for me. Which means I have a year from that date to take my sabbatical.

I need ideas. I want to go somewhere I've never been. I want to see things I've never seen. What should I do? I don't just want to sit at home for 6 weeks. I want to get out. Ideas???

I gotta start saving my money!!

Changes...

So, those of you who follow me on facebook ("follow"...hmm...that sounds like I'm famous or something), those of you who are my friends on facebook (much better) know that I've been working hard at not drinking soda and eating the 5-whites; white sugar, flour, rice, pasta, and potatoes.

These are necessary changes I'm having to make...or more like...I'm choosing to make in order to be healthy, and get my body back into the shape it was 8 years ago (wow, it's been a long time).

Here's the dealio.

3 weeks ago I was chosen to be one of the many participants in a study for a new weight loss product XANGO is coming out with. I was thrilled! Finally something to help me, right? I was just hoping I wouldn't get the placebo...I wanted the real stuff!

Well, part of this study means they take your vitals, your weight, and do some blood work to test your cholesterol, triglycerides, and blood glucose. This way they can see what effect the product has had on you...assuming you don't have the placebo. And if you do have the placebo...well...it would show whether it was mind over matter kind of thing, I guess...I don't know. Anyway...

I went to the testing office where they did all that fun stuff. I was scared to see my weight, happy that my blood pressure was normal, sad that my BMI was high, and freaked out to see that my blood glucose levels were 257.

"wow, that's really high?" said the tester lady.
"Really? What should it be?" I said.
"under 120" she replied.
"oh crap!" I said as if I had just gotten a death sentance.

I walked out with my head not-so-high. Frantically worried about my results. I immediately called my Dad (who has type 2 Diabetes) and asked him what he thought...or any words or advice. I was scared. Big time. (I know I should have called hubby first, but all I could think about was that I could have the same thing my dad has). Of course he said, "oh man, that's not good". Ahhh!

To make a long story short I decided then and there that soda was now out of the question and so was sugar. I even had her re-test my levels again after I had fasted 12 hours...the blood glucose level was even higher.

"This is not good!" I thought.

I made an appointment to see my doctor. A week and a half later I was seen. He looked at my numbers and said that it was a sure sign that I had Diabetes.

ME! 33 year old ME has Diabetes! How can this be! "I'm too young for this", I told my Dr. "yeah you are", he said. "Having diabetes and the toll it takes on your body is as if you've already had a heart attack", he continued on.

I wanted to burst into tears right then and there. This couldn't be happening!!

I have always been so fearful of Diabetes, especially since my Dad has it. I used to worry so much about my weight back in the day...but for some reason in the last 8 years I just haven't cared. I kind of gave up. Why? I don't know.

But, the time has come for changes. Big changes. I no longer eat sugar, nor any of the other "whites". I no longer drink soda. I'm working out. I'm finally seeing a light at the end of the tunnel.

Why?? Because in 3 months if my levels haven't gone down the doc told me I'm going to be on Insulin.

NO WAY! I'm NOT going there!!

I'm grateful for the support I've gotten from people. Recipes and links for recipes friends have sent me for things I CAN eat that don't contain those evil blood sugar rising things.

It's been overwhelming trying to figure things out and make these changes. But things are coming along. I'm down 9 lbs and my stomach doesn't protrude as much (yay!)

I'm feeling optimistic.

Here's to my new life changes and kicking this Diabetes in the butt-ocks (say it life Forrest Gump)

Speaking of houses...

Check out this site I found, called House of Turquoise. Holy I'm in LOOOVE!!!

Hooked on Houses?

I totally am.

I could stare at houses and house plans all day long. Really I could.

I love to envision myself living there, or how I would decorate it, etc, etc.

I love my home and I'm grateful for it. I just love to look around at other homes.

Gosh, that makes it sound like I'm cheating on my own house.

Ok, so I found a site that I am now addicted to...check it out on the button there on the side. "Hooked on Houses". It contains posts about all sorts of homes. Celebrity homes, TV/Movie homes, beach cottages, etc. It talks about my favorite movie homes, and what they look like now, after the movie. Oh, I love it!

Some of my favorite movie homes are...

-Home Alone, home: This one started my fettish for homes. I would watch this movie just to see that white and red brick Suburban, Chicago, beauty.

-Father of the Bride, home: Ah yes, that one too was an early favorite. The white beauty with vines creeping up the front, and beautiful trees all around in a beautiful quaint neighborhood that you dream of raising kids in.

-Dan in Real Life: Oh, this one I loooove. I have dreamed of living in the east coast, and this farmhouse - meets Cape Cod - meets Hamptons, home, definitely falls into that dream. Love it!

-The Holiday: Ok, so all 3 homes in this movie get me excited. I love the cute cottage that Iris lives in, so lovely. I love Amanda Wood's California charmer, and Graham's elegant English home. Love, love, love! (...and the part when Iris jumps onto Amanda's bed after she first sees it...I want to jump on a hugely fluffy bed like that!)

-The Family Stone: I love the coziness of this home. I love the decorating, even though it looks cluttered...it looks homey. They did a good job reeling me in.

Take the quiz on blog to see if you are hooked on houses. I think I got all except maybe two. I'm definitely hooked.

As for my decorating style...I like clean, and fresh feeling things. I don't like a lot of "stuff". I like it simple, yet homey.

Here's what I'm talking about...

Loooooove this inside of this house. Oh my! Yes, my taste is a bit pricey...as Ryan says...lol. I can dream, right?

Love the white accents with the dark wood flooring

I love the ceiling, the tons of natural light and the brightness of it all.

another view...

Oh the ceiling...the CEILING! I love it, and I love white cabinets. That will be a must in my next home.

I love the accent colors in the kitchen...so pretty.

A fun, cozy, comfy family room.

love the craft room/laundry room. The yellow cabinets are lovely.

This is how my bed room is going to look. I already told Ryan I wanted it like this...love the white, textured duvet.

same lovely white duvet with different accent pillows...so pretty.